The wait

Faith is gone and innocence lost. As teary hours go by, moments seem like ages. As each minute comments remind a mind fucked ass of the past that used to be, he cant stop repenting. Feeling pity, for himself. Yes he lied. He cheated. Did the worst possible things known to mankind. He is your everyday asshole. but wait, he is not. He loved. Yes he did, like crazy. Still does. Every unslept hour of every unslept night dies in her thoughts. Sorry is a word that would not do it. Sorry is too sorry to even be a part of the discussion. With her gone, everything feels like a maze of stupidity. the times she called up to cuss were better. At least he got to hear her voice. God knows how relieved he would be..only if she calls. be it to cuss at him...what if..she calls..

WHAT IF

If only, I had another chance to show, Im not the lier she thinks I am. Im not as evil as I  seemingly come across. What if I had another go..at what I couldn't value for splits of mind fucked craziness..what if..I had it all back..what if,,I got another chance, to show her how much I love, How much I care... What if.....